


I was an island

by memory_bees



Series: all of my fanfics in one place [19]
Category: The Outsiders - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Boys Kissing, Cliffhangers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Kissing, M/M, Making Out, bitter sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:41:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25559002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/memory_bees/pseuds/memory_bees
Summary: Before you came along
Relationships: Darrel Curtis/Tim Shepard
Series: all of my fanfics in one place [19]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1183928
Comments: 4
Kudos: 22





	I was an island

**Author's Note:**

> i'm a tarry stan account now no regrets

Darry was used to being alone.   
  
He was used to being practically exiled in his own home, everyone too scared to talk to him or just figuring he was too tired. He was. And it didn’t really matter to him if anyone asked him if he wanted to go out to get a burger for lunch. He didn’t have time, a granola bar would be okay. Even if he really missed going out with his buddies for lunch. That was something from a life long since passed, and certainly not one he lived anymore.

It was fine. He was fine.

It was a miracle, really, that he had the time and energy to go out on the off chance Two-Bit asked him if he wanted to go to Buck’s. It had been ages since he had been at the little dive bar, but he knew it well enough to stick to the back room so the awfully cheesy country music wasn’t too loud and the piss drenched smell of the couches couldn’t quite reach him so he could just sip a beer in silence. He mused to himself how even when surrounded by people he was alone. He glanced out into the crowd of the other room and saw Two-Bit get dragged upstairs by a pretty piece of skirt, her blonde ponytail half undone and her shirt sagging down her shoulder. He sighed and stared down into the yellow-brown of his bottle as the fact that he truly was isolated even in public crept up the back of his neck. He didn’t care all that much, nothing he wasn’t used to.

It took a minute for him to notice the body sliding up next to him. And even longer to realize who the voice attached to it belonged to.

“What’re you doin’ in this shit-hole, Curtis?” Tim Shepard asked, deep blue eyes filled with something akin to amusement.

Darry tried not to notice the way Tim’s arm curled around the back of the bench they were sitting on, the rough rub of cheap faux-leather suddenly making the sweaty stickiness of his arms that much more noticeable. He swallowed, clearing his throat, forcing himself to forget the way Shepard’s eyes watched the bob of his Adam’s apple. Up and down.

“Two-Bit brought me out, but, well…” His eyes found their way to the stairs through the clouded glass of the window leading into the other room. His shoulders relaxed when Tim’s eyes followed his gaze, an uncharacteristic snort leaving him when his eyes landed on the stairs.

The elder man inhaled slowly, and his nose stung at the beer-bitter smell surrounding them. He closed his eyes, steadying his heart, but when he found the courage to open them he was met with Tim’s eyes staring right back at him. Darry’s eyes lazily found their way to the arm not on the back of the bench and found it pressed palm down against the table. And distantly he realized he was boxed in.

When his eyes found Tim’s again he felt his heart rate pick up as he once again realized he was being watched. It was almost predatory and before either of them knew it their lips were pressed against each other. 

Darry turned to face Tim, one leg pressed against his chest and Tim’s and the other being grabbed and pulled to rest over the blue-eyed man’s hip. The man-handling made something deep and hot and red spark in his stomach and he pulled Tim that much closer by his hair. They pulled away for a second, lips spit slick and red and the brunet couldn’t tell if they’d been kissing for an hour or a minute. He found himself not caring though when their lips met again with just as much ferocity.

Someone must’ve called for Tim because he heard the correct consonants and syllables fall from a far away mouth, but when he made to pull away from their kiss he felt a rough hand grab the back of his neck to keep him where he was and his brain melted away. Despite the hand keeping him where he was the hood decided to go exploring, mouth and tongue slipping away from Darry’s and down to his neck. It was almost too much, a gasp escaping him when Tim bit down at his throat, the sting a sure sign there’d be a mark tomorrow. Normally he’d be appalled at the thought of any sign that he had been with someone showing to the rest of the neighborhood, but with the way Tim’s hand had found its way up his shirt and was skirting up his stomach, he couldn’t care too much.

“Shit, let me take you out,” Tim said into his skin. “Like on a date.”   
  
Somehow, despite every other time his brain slipped out of his ears in the past however long, Darry found it in himself to snap back with a bite of sarcasm on his tongue, “Now, Shepard, really?”

Despite his transgression, the man laughed, “No, not right now. Maybe tomorrow, or Sunday, or whenever you’re free. Right now I just want to make you scream.”

Darry gasped in spite of himself and said, “Okay, god, please. I’m free next Thursday.”

And an hour later found them in Tim’s bed, Darry half asleep with his throat raw. It was slow and lazy compared to earlier, which had been all bite and no tenderness whatsoever. Through all the brain fog he finally registered that Tim was still there, chest warm beneath his cheek. It was odd. Through all the closeness of being so intimate, his partner always ended up leaving just a few minutes later. The fact that Tim hadn’t left yet was enough to make him look up, finding rings of blue surrounding blown black pupils staring right back at him.

“So, Thursday good for you?” He asked, and Darry nodded because Thursday was in fact the only other day he had free all month and Tim was leaning in and dragging him up for a kiss.

Darry couldn’t understand it.

Three months. Three god damn months since he had first fallen into Tim Shepard’s bed and he still refused to fucking  _ leave _ . It almost made him mad, because every other person that hadn’t left had at least drifted. But for whatever reason, Tim refused. It was even weirder still because while Darry thought they’d be just fuck buddies, or at least Tim would just see him as someone to pin against the wall on the off chance they were at Buck’s the same time, he was considerate towards him.

The worst part was that he couldn’t figure out Shepard’s motive for keeping him around. He whispered sweet things to him while they just laid in bed late at night after Darry had gotten home from work. And the day after they fucked- Darry couldn’t call it anything else, anything else was too intimate- Tim’d come up behind him as the brunet made breakfast and hug him. It would’ve been fine if whenever this happened the younger man wouldn’t kiss up and down over his bruised neck and tell him how- how  _ pretty _ he looked with them. It almost made him sick whenever he said it because Darry knew this was all leading up to something, a favor, maybe. And the worst part was that Darry knew he’d do whatever Tim asked because even though he knew everything was leading up to some sort of disaster, he took comfort in the fake reality that maybe Tim just loved him because he wanted to.

It came to a head when they found themselves in Tim’s bed yet again, Darry gasping as wet kisses were trailed down from his collarbone down to his hip. It was far away though. The fog in his head not the kind that makes his knees go weak and narrow his thoughts down to TimTimTimTim. It was just foggy, disconnecting him from the moment so he was lost in his thoughts. He stared at the ceiling, wondering why Tim was being so slow and careful this time. They usually went in a way that left him aching for a day or so after. This wasn’t biting, it was slow and gentle and the pull of his skin wasn’t stinging because Tim took the time to lick the hurt away.

He jumped when he felt a hand on his cheek and when his eyes focused back into the room Tim’s face was suddenly hovering over his. And he was staring like he was  _ worried _ which didn’t make sense because why did Tim have to care about him?

“What’s wrong, baby?” Tim asked, the other hand not on his face was holding onto his thigh, rubbing it through the denim of his jeans.

The question was so innocent and heartfelt Darry felt a bit of anger bubble in his stomach and he asked, “Why do you care about me so much?” The blue-eyes watching his face widened and the mouth that just seconds before had been sucking bruises into his hips opened to say something, but he beat him to the punch, “What do you want, Tim? Why haven’t you just fucking  _ left _ already? I’m not- I don’t deserve your fucking attention, and why would you care about me so much if you don’t want something from me?” The words spilled from his mouth like blood from a cut artery.

“What? Dar, c’mon, you serious right now? I don’t want shit from you.” Tim shot back, the slightest bit of indignation sharpening his tongue.

Darry frowned and moved up the bed, away from Tim, and pressed his back against the headboard. The air in the room was thick and tense and the two men were locked in a staring contest. Suddenly Darry was very aware that he was the only one of the two without a shirt and he crossed his arms over his chest as if that would change anything about the situation.

“Why don’t you just leave? Why do you care so much?” Darry asked, voice much quieter than before.

Tim shook his head and Darry felt his heart drop into his stomach and shrivel up in the acid. This was it. He had finally shown him that he wasn’t worth his time. He’d find someone else to fuck and give his time and sweetened words to. It was fine and it would be better even if Darry wanted to cry his lungs straight out of his chest at the thought that he wouldn’t be able to live in the fantasy of Tim loving him anymore. It was fine. He was fine.

“With how smart you are you really have no common sense in that head of yours, huh?”

The question was not what he was expecting at all, and right before Darry could shoot back his poison Tim had him by the hips and was kissing him like a dehydrated man drinks water. That was enough to get Darry to melt into him, arms coming up around his shoulders and a content sigh from his nose. It only lasted for a few seconds until Tim pulled away, breathing deep with a laugh lacing the sound just a bit.

“I have no damn clue how you haven’t noticed it yet, but I kinda love you, Dar.” Tim murmured, lips ghosting against Darry’s.

The older man swallowed audibly and nodded, “Oh.” Was all he said, his brain once again fogged up but for a much better reason this time.

The air changed once again into something much calmer as Tim pressed his forehead onto Darry’s, their breath intermingling. It was comfortable, everything loud in comparison to the quietness of the room. The gentle brushing of their jeans as they slowly slid down the bed filling the silence for a moment. Darry sighed happily as Tim managed to get his hands under his back so he could hold him by the waist, pinning him down with his own body alone. It was comforting, even if in the back of his mind the older man was trying to convince himself that Tim was just lying to make him feel better. It didn’t matter that much, really, as long as he got to have this for just a bit longer. It would be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on [tumblr](sunny-gnelf.tumblr.com) for more kinda sad gay shenanigans or maybe shoot me a message on discord instead (Mom Friend#2371)


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